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I'm completely with you, it took so many years till I got into learning again.
That one year before college when I worked at a carpenter (just to get my head straight again after those years of frustration) is still following me, I love my small workshop at home & chipping away on scrap wood, building small furniture here and there.
I feel that when we got our own kids it was kinda therapeutic to me in that regard, plus it's just fun to get a bit of revenge, let's say our kids teachers were very relieved as they completed school and I wasn't on theiy got rid of that maniac dad ๐
To this day I wish I had been able to take a year off after high school, maybe just taken some classes like life drawing classes or something that didn't have the pressure of getting good grades attached to them to break out of that fear of failure habit and avoid burnout. I went to college for art&animation in the game industry, and stopped drawing for 10 years because of the burnout I got after 2 years of college.
It sucks because I absolutely love learning new things, but can't stand a structured learning environment anymore. Give me YouTube videos and online guides and I'll suck them down all day. I'd love to be able to do a lot of traveling again for the same reason, seeing new things and learning new stuff about different people and places is a joy. But put me in a classroom and I'll fall right asleep and retain nothing.