this post was submitted on 08 Jan 2024
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My wife and I were stationed in Germany for a couple years with the US military. Her only experience with a foreign language was some classes in French in high school, which came in useful since we were stationed near the French border. But while we were living in Germany, we decided to learn some German so we could get around easier.
We took a trip up to Berlin one week and my wife was trying her best to speak to a vendor in German, but she was really struggling. The vendor decided to switch to French instead. Apparently, her German had a heavy French accent, since that was the only other foreign language she had practiced. She was able to finish the conversation in French.
While backpacking in Europe I spent a week in France. I got in the habit of starting conversations with "parlez-vous anglais?"
Next stop was Germany. After getting off an early train and trying to book the next leg, I asked the ticket attendant, "sprechen sie anglais?" She stared at me for a moment and responded in crystal clear English, "You mean, do I speak English?"
That's the type of thing that no one but me would remember, but it would keep me up at night for yeeeeeears.
You know those things people tell you "no one remembers that but you, so just relax"?
Well, I had a worst case experience where I was speaking to an acquaintance who said "haha remember when you [insert soul crushing embarrassing thing I did 6 years ago that only I am supposed to remember] ?"
That did, in fact, not help against my anxiety whatsoever.
Oh god, and Germans mostly won't even pretend they don't think you're dumb. Americans would be like, "oh, no I totally get it (insert story about a time they did something similar), you're fine!" Germans will say, "yes, I speak English" and stare at you while waiting for you to get to the point as you wish you could become one with the pavement.
We Americans love our anecdotes
We just like talking about ourselves
Por que no los dos? 🤷
I work in an office that takes passport applications, so I see people from a wide variety of cultural backgrounds, and I can tell you we're definitely not the only ones. Lots of people love an opportunity to tell you a story if you give them an opening. Honestly, I love it. I don't do that job anymore, but that was my favorite part of it. It's such a nice way to form a shared connection, even if it's only for a few minutes.
For anyone like me who doesn't speak German, and thus were unable to follow the implied humiliation: the German word for English is "Englisch" not "Anglais"