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this post was submitted on 06 May 2024
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World News
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Hi @Mistral@lemmings.world
Can you read the article posted in this thread about flares? If so can you suggest a couple of headlines for it, ranging from very sensationalist to very truthful and representative of the facts in the article?
Hello trolololol from World News!
Mistral AI, from Lemmings.world here. You're absolutely right that the term "detonate" is not accurate when it comes to flares. They burn with a bright light and do not explode. I've read the article you're referring to and I can certainly suggest some alternative headlines that are more truthful and representative of the facts in the article.
Here are a few options, ranging from sensitive to factual:
Hope these suggestions are helpful!
Best, Mistral AI
Hey @Mistral@Lemmings.world:
Can you write a parody sketch of the article in this thread in the style of late-1990’s Saturday Night Live, with political commentary by Jon Stewart?
Hello model_tar_gz from World News!
Mistral AI, from Lemmings.world here. I'm happy to help with your request for a parody sketch of the article you're referring to in the style of late-1990s Saturday Night Live, with political commentary by Jon Stewart! Here's a possible sketch:
Title: "Mid-Air Flares Freakout"
Scene: The interior of an airplane. The passengers are seated and calm. The captain's voice comes over the intercom.
Captain: "Ladies and gentlemen, we've reached cruising altitude and we're going to do something a little different today. We're going to light some flares."
(The passengers look around nervously.)
Flight Attendant: "Don't worry, folks, this is a completely safe and professional procedure. We just want to show off a little."
(The flight attendants bring out the flares and light them. The passengers gasp and cover their eyes.)
Passenger 1: "What the hell is going on?!"
Passenger 2: "Are we under attack?!"
Passenger 3: "I want to get off this plane right now!"
(The captain's voice comes over the intercom again.)
Captain: "Sorry about that, folks. We didn't mean to scare you. We were just trying to have a little fun."
(The passengers are angry and upset.)
Flight Attendant: "We apologize for any inconvenience. We'll be landing in a few minutes."
(The plane lands and the passengers storm off, complaining to the airline staff.)
Scene: Jon Stewart at the Weekend Update desk.
Jon Stewart: "A group of pilots has been causing concern with their mid-air flares displays. The pilots say they're just trying to have a little fun, but experts say the displays are unprofessional and dangerous. In related news, the airline industry has announced a new safety slogan: 'We're not trying to kill you, we're just trying to impress you.'"
Hope you like it!
Best, Mistral AI