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I’ve seen that countless times on tech based subs when I was on that site. Very weird to see a feature suggestion bring up so much hostility from people.

I've receiced a reddit cares message just because I supported a male idol group. I definitely don't miss that part of reddit. My experience browsing lemmy/beehaw/kbin is much nicer since people aren't willing to tolerate vitriol and want that part of reddit to stay at reddit. Everyone's tired of always being angry at a faceless mob.

Too many morons use the downvote button as a “Dislike/Disagree” button. It’s why I like that downvotes are disabled here. If you disagree with someone, you’re encouraged to actually have a discussion instead of lazily pressing the downvote arrow and leaving.

Thank you for sharing your experience. Reading the replies it seems like most of us have experienced similar from Reddit, and I agree with ArtZuron's comment "the more public an online space becomes [...] [t]he loudest most obnoxious people ruin it". I'm reminded of Alyaza's post of how unchecked toxicity can rapidly poison a userbase and drive away positive interaction. MayonnaiseArch sums it up better than I can: "being abused and gaslit and molested in any single interaction really makes you act in a different way, you can’t be honest or open in that kind of environment"

Sometime in the past few years I feel like reddit devolved into an argument fest. It seems like the only thing anyone is interested in is arguing or saying rude or hateful shit in the comments. It turned me off to commenting tbh and even pre-api nonsense made me realize I didn't enjoy reddit the way I used to.

It's nice here still, and hopefully stays that way. Sometimes I'll write something that I realize could be taken as rude and I'll feel like an absolute asshole until I fix it. Like I'm worried I'll upset someone when I didn't mean to... I haven't given something like that a second thought on Reddit in years.

Also if anyone reads a comment from me and I sound like an asshole, please let me know! It's almost certainly not intended, especially anywhere on Beehaw.

I was amazed how many times on Reddit I had hostile comments in response, repeatedly to a comment that was days old. It's like there were people just trolling around looking for a comment to attack, and once they did it was relentless. I'm so glad I was able to quit Reddit entirely. It was a toxic environment.

First off, OP, I'm sorry that you had to go through that. Hostile responses hurt, particularly when you're just trying to help. I hope this doesn't stop you from sharing ideas in the future. We need more people willing to share ideas so we can have good thought diversity.

That being said, I don't think this is a good reason to leave Reddit or hate Reddit.

I know a lot of us are really highly charged right now and the Reddit hate is strong. We got burned by something that was a major part of our lives for many years. But the toxicity of the participants is not exactly a Reddit thing. This is an internet thing. You are not getting away from that here.

I have had similar experiences as OP on Reddit and I'm also seeing similar behaviors on Lemmy as well, particularly now that it is growing faster.

Lemmy and federated services in general do not automatically mean that the community is nicer or are more respectful. That is not the problem these services try to solve. They solve issues of ownership and centralization. Even communities like Beehaw aren't free from this either. I've seen some pretty toxic behavior, even on Beehaw. They can't escape that. But what they can do is set a standard for expected behaviors and then moderate the community as best they can. This doesn't eliminate the problem, but at least it sets a stage where we can play, and call out when someone crosses the line.

So let's not kid ourselves. When people from different backgrounds, views, and intents come together with the capability of being anonymous and behind a screen, the bad actors WILL come and join the fray. That's just part of internet connected life.

I always have had this experience. I posted a silly mess up I had with my 3D printer once and all the comments were focused on the fact that I had a printer that wasn’t part of the circlejerk of “best printers according to the subreddit”.

I got called a dumbass and there was a comment chain where 2 people pondered about just how stupid I would have to be to buy the printer I have now.

Not a single comment referring to my actual post, just all jumping down my throat because I dare not buy the Ender 3.