Look at all the stuff in your house. That's not minimalist at all! You need to throw it all away, and instead buy iMinimalTable, for only $499.

Then buy iMinimalTable 2 next year.

Hate to be a spoilsport, but that specific article does seem to be available from Nature without a paywall: https://www.nature.com/articles/356739a0.pdf

Still funny/sad, though.

Sometimes I look at the wide open sky and think "What if gravity suddenly reverses and I fall up into the sky and then space? That would be really dangerous."

I used to use one of these in the late 90s. I think it was called Filezilla (Downzilla? I forget; something zilla anyhow) or something, and it made dinosaur sounds when queuing up downloads.

I own an ID3 and it's got the same capacitive bullshit steering wheel. So far I've only managed to accidentally fuck with the audio by brushing the right side of the wheel during a turn, but it's really scary that those cruise control buttons are right there with the potential to be fucked with at random.

Luckily I've learned to be pretty well aware of the adaptive cruise control suddenly deciding there's a different speed limit on the road than what's actually there, so maybe I can manage to catch any accidental fuckings with the buttons too.

Hey guys, I just heard somewhere that they renamed the Kremlin to Kharkiv?

I'm not one to kink-shame, but why are you shitting in a pot of oil in the first place?

Sauron might have shown up at Morannon personally to faceroll everyone into oblivion before Gollum had time to fall into Mt. Doom, but he was too busy having second breakfast to attend.

3rd person view, especially when driving

Jos mitään, niin tämä saa mun epäilemään että Putin onkin yhtäkkiä kuollut.

The 90s is to modern kids what the 60s was to kids in the 90s

I forget the exact wording, but the Ring essentially showed Sam visions of being some sort of a supreme gardener king. Sam dismissed that as fucking stupid, because he just wants a simple garden.