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this post was submitted on 21 Nov 2024
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No Stupid Questions
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I'm a southerner. Take what I'm about to tell you as close to the grain of the problem as possible, because it is.
Here's the thing. 9 times out of 10, a Southern man is going to meet a lone trans or gay person, have a pleasant experience talking to them and go about their day, they even make friends with the person, spend years talking to them, send gifts, become family members, etc.
But you know what?
Behind closed doors, it's "fuck those trannies", "not in my schools", etc. My mom does it, her sister does it, my dad did it. It's hypocrisy at an extreme level while also ignoring it at an extreme level.
"Well I have gay friends... I'm not homowhatzit"
THEY'RE TEACHING WHAT!?
"Double Standard" might as well be the tagline for the entire South. They'll protect their religion and the expectations put on them by their parents and social norms on a general level across the board, while still shaking hands and eating cake with their lgbtq+ buddies.
Just remember any southerner is one thought from God away from stabbing you in the back at all times, because no matter how close you get to them, even as a family member, that book and the expectations behind it means more, was beat into them more, every day since they were born until you met them.
Incorrect. The book itself means very little, just their interpretation.
100%
My mom went to an integrated school in the South, made friends... but sometimes overheard racist slurs and threats behind closed doors. Same story with family I have now, all pleasent in public, friends with some gay family members. But vehemently anti-vaccine and such behind closed doors... I have horrible stories I can't even repeat.
The duality is unreal.
A question is where that behind-doors comes from... a lot is from church. Church like you've never seen if you haven't been to the South.
Your favorite search engine -> "bless your heart meaning" and good luck navigating the waters.
I thought this was pretty universally known in the US because I'm not from the US and never been further south than NYC when I did visit, but even I have seen it in some movie and immediately picked it up based on the tone and connect. I mean it was pretty much "he said something incredibly stupid" -> "oh bless his heart" between some southern grandmas
Might've been Big Mommas House, might've been something else entirely.
Southerner here and I'll say you were right, up until your last paragraph.
This part however, is bullshit.
We're not all the same and that you would suggest so actually pisses me off. Replace the word "southerner" in that sentence with any other group of people and see if you still find it acceptable.
Fucking lol at hateful idiots stereotyping an entire geographic area. I'm sure in their minds it's completely different than stereotyping people because of their race/creed/gender/whatever.
I lived with them long enough that the shadow of a doubt has its own lamp. I've heard racist and misogynist shit from people I've known for a decade or more who never had a sign of it before.
Yep, I'm set with it. Fuck em. Worth it.
Yeah that's called "prejudice" and isnt a good quality.
Swap "southern" for "black" or "gay" and see if you'd be proud to make that same claim.
I'll be goddamn. I've seen family members ousted from a dinner table, in my own fucking family.
Maybe in your pampered version of the South.
In mine, they leave and never come back or speak to you again and all the old folks wonder why, while forgetting the last 60 family get togethers' arguments.
"Pampered version of the South" lol I grew up in Bum-Fuck, Florida and have lived in various southern cities as well as spending much of my youth in random rural areas.
Racists and pieces of shit exist everywhere and I'm not denying that. Your blanket statement regarding all southerners is where I take issue.
Don't forget you said you were a southerner yourself, so am I to expect God will speak to you at any moment and turn you into an even more prejudiced person or...? Because if that's a true statement, which it isn't, you're saying you yourself should never be trusted. And if that's the case, why should we listen to what you, who is just another Southern, backstabbing, secret Bible thumping, homophobic, racist (accordng to your own flawed statement) have to say anyway?