yet you take affront to my pointing out that the terminology used is sexist?

A system that enforces gender roles is of course going to be sexist by definition. It would be incredibly difficult to talk about a system with strictly enforced gender roles without talking about gender or their roles.

Which part of it is it that you have such a hard time coming to terms with? That women, by default, is not always the victim, or is it that men is not always the perpetrator?

That is exactly what is being said in the OP, so I don't understand what you're disagreeing with here.