This isn’t depression.. I mean that’s probably some of it, but not the bulk of it. I’m actually in a much better headspace now than I’ve been for the last 15 years or so. It turns out my baseline happiness is that of a relentless optimist. Everything is going to be good, even though it really isn’t right now sort of thing. I have zero basis for that assertion, because my life is a complete shitshow, but I won part of the gene lottery on that one.

I was dx adhd at 5 (35 years ago) and pretty sure there’s a heavy dose of autism in there that wasn’t picked up because I’m AFAB and old, and getting screened for that now serves no purpose unless I want to be in a “work camp”.. (American)

The problem is object permanence. Most of the time I don’t even remember I have a treadmill, and when I do, like when I see the box, I never want to set the damned thing up. It’s not pressing or important, nor is it something I want to do, so it doesn’t get done.

I just built a chicken coop tho, so I’m capable of doing things I need to do, just not things I should, but would rather not tbh, do.