Why would anyone want to change when the rewards for being awful are so good? Doing the things you described not only make advancement in a dark society nearly impossible, but it takes a personal toll on the psyche and perspective of the person attempting bettering themselves and the world around them. I say this as someone doing the work.

[–] SkyeStarfall@lemmy.blahaj.zone 7 points 1 month ago

Maybe it makes achieving personal things in a dark society harder, but it strongly helps to improve society itself. And it's much more pleasant to live in the opposite of a dark society. A better society is not a zero sum game

Healing is hard and uncomfortable in the short to medium term, but in the long term it's always preferred

[–] saimen@feddit.org 6 points 1 month ago

Imagining humanity as one organism to which you can either contribute positively or which you can actively damage helps for me.

Or just believing in karma in its simplest form: you reap what you sow.

[–] Maeve@kbin.earth 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Doing the work is exploring and sitting with the uncomfortable feelings, going beyond the obvious stem to find the root. I don't like it either, but it gets better, then worse, then better for a while. Sometimes therapy is necessary.

[–] the_q@lemmy.zip 1 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Yeah. It mostly sucks at least for me. A cornerstone of a lot of my personal crap is lack of self worth which makes improvement pretty tough. I've been in therapy for over 5 years now, and understanding concepts is much easier than applying them. Of course that's just my experience.

[–] Maeve@kbin.earth 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)

That's a lot more common than you would imagine. You're worth it though. Sometimes you may not feel like it. Show up for yourself, anyway.

[–] the_q@lemmy.zip 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)

You're right. I know my experience isn't uncommon and that's unfortunate. Thank you fur the kind words.

[–] Maeve@kbin.earth 2 points 1 month ago

You're so welcome. I've been there, and in therapy off and on for a lot of years. We're in it together.