this post was submitted on 25 Jul 2025
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Why do men keep on having dates with me and then eventually leave? (lemmy.zip)
submitted 2 weeks ago by choihanna@lemmy.zip to c/askmen@lemmy.world
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So before anything I'm a trans woman (20), I do not claim to be a real woman or try to put women down or mock them. So please I'd like to ask you to abstein from comments about it because I already know what I am.

I've been trying dating apps because they feel safer than just dating people from your daily life when I was a teen (friends and classmates).

I do have a note on my profile that notifies these men about what I am before they can chat with me, some unmatch, others will say bad stuff before leaving, but another big amount stay. Everything goes fine we chat for a long time, we have a few dates, but in the end they all seem to lose interest at some point.

It just makes me so tired of meeting a lot of different men every month. I don't understand what they want.

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[–] captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.works 4 points 2 weeks ago

Okay so @Big_Boss_77@lemmynsfw.com there just hypothesized they're fetishizing you...I'm going to hypothesize it's the opposite, they're just barely willing to give you a shot.

So, typical straight guy, downloads Tinder. Swipes right on ten or twenty thousand women. He gets one match: You. "Trans? Really? Sigh. Okay fuck it let's give her a try."

Here's a little known and widely disputed fact about straight men: they don't like having sex with people who have penises. So being asked by the trans woman you just met on Twitter "By the way, are you bi?" sounds a lot like "By the way, I have a penis, are you good with that?"

No, he's not. So he nopes out. And probably stops swiping right on trans women.