I don't give much credence to the word "gender" and their norms simply follow from sexual dimorphism in my understanding. I don't think the vast majority of human beings need to "embrace" their sex either, they simply are, much like the rest of mammals. Humans are more complex but why "gendrify" some slight variations in personality traits? Some things simply come more naturally to one sex and not the other because of it, and their "competence" is not a marking of "gender fluidity" but development/maturity (which can be affected by many things, like trauma and ideology, because again human beings are complex), or simply variance within parameters. My "somehow" was more about stuff that you mentioned like intersex folks, Klinefelter, etc., which as you probably know affects the tiniest minority of human beings, and also the possibility that a person's brain might have been fundamentally altered because of something not going as expected in the development process. Should we consider those with Down's syndrome, for instance, another "viable" category of human being or understand it, as we do, as something that happens simply because 'shit happens' through growth, because mechanical processes can sometimes go tits up? You can modify parts of you either superficially or more deeply through hormonal changes thanks to current technology but that doesn't mean you ARE, just that you sought changes and you got them (was MJ a white man?). People also conflate sexual attraction with "sexual identity", which is unnecessary and just doesn't follow, which is why we have LGBT and aren't just separate categories. Also, that muscle mass argument is just wrong, come on now, friend. I think many just get lost in words too, and that gives credence to their feelings to a certain degree (and in certain communities, it is even encouraged) and as such will just go entirely in that direction, looking to force changes (is it not possible to be a sensitive, homosexual man without necessarily having to consider yourself a woman, for example? I personally know two, just saying). And it's not a reason to hate people or anything even close to it, of course, but that's another conversation (that should be short and with obvious conclusions).

Anyway, I hope this comment was understood with the same civility and respect I tried to phrase it in, and I admit it the subject might be more complex than my current understanding of it and that it might be flawed. I understand it's an emotionally difficult conversation to have, and more so for those who are the topic of the conversation. Peace!