Wanna know how you can tell someone never had sex in any water-centric location like shower, hot tub, pool, etc etc etc? They say its the best without knowing empirically that natural human lubricant secretions are lipid based and do not work well when mixed with water. The water washes away any oral or vaginal secretions leaving you with a feeling of masterbating with a dry rubber glove. Not as bad but it is not the warm american apple pie feeling youre used to. Orrrrrr maybe thats your kink, when fucking feels like a plastic slide on a dry bare skinned ass screeching down the slide like you have built in anti lock breaks🤣🤣🤣 its a fuckin weird feeling and completely unexpected the first time you experience it.

[–] Krudler@lemmy.world 16 points 3 days ago

Yeah I was just thinking, that person has never had sex in a watery environment. It is absolutely the "fucking" worst.

[–] Marshezezz@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 points 3 days ago

lol for real that drives me nuts. I tried to have pool sex and quickly learned that it was not going to go in and was like oh yeah, water..

[–] Maestro@fedia.io 5 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Or maybe just keep your pleasure bits out of the direct shower stream during the deed. Works like a charm.

[–] TheAlbatross@lemmy.blahaj.zone 7 points 3 days ago (2 children)

The trick is standing in juuuuuust the right place so the water is flowing down both your backs but you ain't getting waterboarded when you're going down on them.

It's an art, really.

[–] fan0m@lemmy.world 8 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Sounds like too much effort. I’m on a schedule here

[–] czardestructo@lemmy.world 7 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

[–] Marshezezz@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 3 days ago

Yeah but there’s also beds

[–] shalafi@lemmy.world 4 points 3 days ago

Read it twice hoping they were joking. "Dry rubber glove" indeed.

[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 1 points 3 days ago

Cunnilingus like waterboarding and not in a hot way