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this post was submitted on 15 Jul 2023
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You Should Know
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YSK - for all the things that can make your life easier!
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**In your post's text body, you must include the reason "Why" YSK: It’s helpful for readability, and informs readers about the importance of the content. **
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What you say: It's easy!
What you (hopefully) mean: Don't be intimidated! You can do it!
What they hear: You must be stupid if you can't do this.
What you say: It's so simple even a child can figure it out!
What you (hopefully) mean: Calm down and work through it. You've got this.
What they hear: Even a child is smarter than you!
Keep in mind that if you're dealing with someone who is struggling it is self-evidently not easy for them. Claiming that it is invalidates their experience and makes them feel small and stupid. Don't do that.
What you should say: I get it. This can be pretty intimidating. Let's work through this together.
It really is that simple.
What I have learned to say is "I understand this is new and confusing; however, don't stress out, I was probably more confused than you are when I first learned this." It throws them off a bit, because they think you're the expert, and it clicks that you had to learn it too. If they probe deeper into why it was hard for me, I explain that I'm so used to how things are supposed to work, I have to step back and see how things can work.