this post was submitted on 01 Feb 2024
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Twist: Payment is on the form of a text or other short note telling you something memorable they saw, a relative, a friend, a flower, a tree, a cat, a dog, the list goes on. The emotional impact of these notes cause you to weep. Your heart grows. You can't stop crying. Dehydration sets in. That growth on your heart, it's a tumor. You die. It looks like the Joker killed you. Genie always wins.
Not if you do like Timmy Turner did and use one of your wishes to get an attorney who will write up an airtight contract ensuring the genie can't do any funny business with your wish.
Edit: also should mention that Norm the genie was voiced by Norm MacDonald
Genies don't do monkey's paw. They are literalists
In the 1994 Disney classic "Return of Jafar" the thief who finds genie Jafar wishes for treasure so Jafar transports him to a sunken pirate ship full of treasure where he nearly drowns and I think is almost eaten by a shark.
So your can twist literal. In this case I did the same. Lawyered.
I don't think I've ever seen someone mention Return of Jafar. I watched that movie on VHS so many times
Twist twist: you only charge .20 cents for a subscription cause there's a shit ton of blind people and you'd still be a millionaire in 3 months.
Twist twist twist: once you're set for life all future profits go to non-profits and charities, funding millions of dollars for restoring vision.
Twist twist twist twist: in order to continue the overall positive of charity, you start working on ways to cause blindness again so their subscription goes to other charities