Don't feel bad about choosing a nice face. Bedside manner is so important.

Imma relate my experience here and it was quite self revelatory at the time.

I had an injured shoulder, from an assault, and was referred to a surgeon for diagnosis and treatment. He was very kind and friendly and reassuring. Even when we had to demonstrate the actions that caused the injury I felt safe.

Later in the week I had to get some xrays. The technician was very professional and he had a neutral face. I was triggered and had a panic attack.

Attackers have uncaring or neutral faces.

later I was thinking how my doctor put on a kind face on purpose , he knew my history and knew how to make me comfortable. The xray technician either knew and didn't care or didn't know how to handle my case.

I'm better now tho seeing a disinterested face always worries me. That is a face of violence.

Such a pain trying to find a psych you click with so you can make the most of therapy ugh. I'm glad you have found someone and booked and appt!! That's awesome!

I’m not sure if you’re already doing this (apologies if you are) but you can get a certain number of counseling sessions and a security camera funded through Victims of Crime. Wish I’d remembered to tell you that earlier

I really hope it provides some help