Men can certainly get better at conversation. I can’t count the number of dates I’ve had where a guy talked for hours about himself and never asked a single question about me. Great way to make sure the first date is the last.
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- The Will To Change: Men, Masculinity, And Love by bell hooks
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As a guy who has been on plenty of dates, I can tell you that there are also plenty of woman who are like that. I suspect that the datingpool in general is saturated with people who are like this.
if we don’t accept ourselves first, if we don’t say it’s okay to be me, then we’re never going to believe that it’s going to be okay to go up and talk to somebody and share ourself with somebody.
i kinda wish this was........ more? like, this isn't not a part of the process, but it's a pretty limited analysis of why men would be reticent to approach women. there's a lot of (very real and good) consideration for women's safety and consent, which situations are OK to approach in and which aren't, etc
i guess the article is focused on how men feel, which is cool, but i think omitting this point means also missing how those worries feed back into creating those feelings of insecurity of men, too
Are men bad at dating?
Almost certainly, but depends on how that's measured.
What metrics do you use for dating success?
Pussies per week.
I'm not sure but surely they can be better at coaching: "The thing that we don’t know, that we don’t realize, is that intimacy is not just sex."