Ask Lemmy

Not being able to freely communicate with about half of humanity is definitely a handicap, lol. Nothing that can't be learned though!

Think the best advice is that when you talk to a woman in public you should have a reason besides her being a woman in public. Like if a man approached me because he thought my shirt looked cool or he saw me reading a book he liked that's a fine bit of casual conversation. If he just point blank asked if I had a boyfriend as if that's the only reason a woman wouldn't want to date a random man she knows nothing about I'd tell him that was none of his business.

If I am not in a place hoping to strike up convo I would not like anyone coming up to me trying to do so. If I'm shopping or eating or getting my car some tires... the last thing I want is some stranger coming anywhere near me.

Were I at a bar or some social event then yes that'd be fine.

I like to talk to a room. i.e. i watch social cues to find an "in" then i try to start a public conversation?

If you don't try you won't get, I'm pretty direct but I have friends who are way way worse than I am.

I generally don't try unless I get at least a smile and/or eye contact held in my direction but I do think most women like to know if they looking attractive even if they aren't interested.

Anyone who takes offense over expressing an interest would have been horrible to date anyway in my opinion.

I'm going to echo the suggestion to approach men (and later women) for whatever reason to practice approaching people you don't "have business" with.

Ask a question, comment on something benign (cool shirt?), etc.

And also expand your list of contexts where it's ok to talk to people.

Anywhere that groups of people gather is a good option. Concerts, cafés potentially, parks...as long as you aren't cornering anybody, you should be fine.

Basically, you're right and thank you for acting that way. Your parents are wrong.

This could depend where you are from. I'm from France and a bit of chit-chat with a stranger is not a bad thing to me. But if a male stranger try a bit too hard to stir up a conversation, I would feel ackward, mostly because I'll "fear" they are trying to hit on me, which is not okay for a stranger to do out of nowhere.

But at the same time if you try to make friend with more women, maybe one day, you'll find a partner in one of them. If you genuinly try to make connection with a woman in a non-sexual and non-romantical way and after sometime, you feel like having another kind of relation, it is totally different and not creepy at all.