this post was submitted on 30 Jul 2025
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Show transcriptScreenshot of a Tumblr post by nongunktional:

when i first heard about the male loneliness epidemic i was like oh yeah close camaraderie and bonding between men is often discouraged in favor of competition or, if not discouraged, at least filtered through a lens of individualism that precludes deep connections. and then i learned what people meant by it (men arent getting laid) to which i say skill issue

to all the men out there not getting laid: try less hard to get laid and try more hard to be an enjoyable and relaxing presence

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[–] Matriks404@lemmy.world 15 points 2 months ago (1 children)

People who make getting laid or not their whole personality are people that I would want nothing to do with.

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[–] pineapplelover@lemmy.dbzer0.com 14 points 2 months ago

I'm with the second guy. I'm not going to doom scroll through useless dating apps and talking to every woman on the street. I'd rather do my own hobbies and do my own things so worst case scenario, I'm happy with what I'm doing, best case scenario I get a SO, or reasonable scenario is I make some friends.

[–] Quexotic@infosec.pub 13 points 2 months ago

Funny. I always thought it was a camaraderie thing because I'm married. That definitely makes a lot of sense though because young men are becoming more right-wing and most women do not like that so it seems like that would be a big hurdle and maybe they just need to figure their shit out.

[–] OlPatchy2Eyes@slrpnk.net 11 points 2 months ago (4 children)

Trying to be a relaxing presence is a bit of a paradox

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[–] tigeruppercut@lemmy.zip 11 points 2 months ago (3 children)

There was an interesting podcast the other day about raising boys in the current era when it seems like many of them are turning to far right grifters and manfluencers

https://player.fm/series/offline-with-jon-favreau/raising-boys-in-the-era-of-incels-maga-and-the-manosphere

[–] damnedfurry@lemmy.world 14 points 2 months ago (3 children)

When the vast majority of everyone other than said grifters et al offers boys nothing but contempt and prejudice, they make them easy pickings for the only people offering them something else, even if they're lying.

It's similar to the reason that a guy who never gets attention from women is likely to 'fall in love' and immediately develop a strong infatuation for the first woman to pay attention to him.

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[–] Toneswirly@lemmy.world 10 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Male loneliness is real and multifactorial, but yeah its also self fulfilling. Rather than examine difficult societal reasons and address them, we fall back on tired masculine tropes and try to blame women for not being accomodating or whatever.

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