this post was submitted on 30 Jul 2025
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Show transcriptScreenshot of a Tumblr post by nongunktional:

when i first heard about the male loneliness epidemic i was like oh yeah close camaraderie and bonding between men is often discouraged in favor of competition or, if not discouraged, at least filtered through a lens of individualism that precludes deep connections. and then i learned what people meant by it (men arent getting laid) to which i say skill issue

to all the men out there not getting laid: try less hard to get laid and try more hard to be an enjoyable and relaxing presence

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[–] lectricleopard@lemmy.world 10 points 1 week ago

Im a lonely man at the dinner table with my wife and extended family.

[–] Toneswirly@lemmy.world 10 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Male loneliness is real and multifactorial, but yeah its also self fulfilling. Rather than examine difficult societal reasons and address them, we fall back on tired masculine tropes and try to blame women for not being accomodating or whatever.

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[–] Gaja0@lemmy.zip 9 points 1 week ago (2 children)

I'm trying really hard to not reduce the issue to "women won't have sex with me" but the responses are flooded with this general sentiment.

I think some guys suffer from mental illness and don't have support from the people around them and things like male privilege can diminish their perceived suffering. Even so, I rarely see men actually talk about it.

Like, only on places like 4chan people are brave enough to spew whatever shit's on their mind and I'll tell you that while they can be the minority in a lot of regards, there is something sincere in their unfiltered, crude language that really helps me understand it a little. A lot of it does feel like whinning about sexlessness, but sometimes they make a point and actually talk about their suffering.

It seems like men are desperate for sex and, in pursuit, find grifters who peddle them conservatism. These are the type of people that come to my mind when we talk about it.

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[–] peoplebeproblems@midwest.social 8 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (2 children)

Ok, ok, ok. I know everyone likes anecdotes.

I don't fall in the lonely camp, but I'm definitely not getting laid.

Why am I not getting laid?

Well I used to think it was cause I was fat, but then I lost a ton of weight. Then I thought it was cause I wasn't fit so I put on muscle. Then I thought it was cause I was vampire pale so I got sunburned.

Reality is:

  1. I annoy myself in my own head. I'm definitely going to annoy a potential sex partner.
  2. I am literally scared of everything. Fear does not encourage one to partake in mating rituals.
  3. I have priorities like a job and a son that are more important than a new woman in my life will be for a while.
  4. Having a big dick doesn't give you big dick energy.
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