this post was submitted on 04 Sep 2025
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Work Reform

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[–] Remember_the_tooth@lemmy.world 62 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

Rockstar always gets me.

"Okay, so is it cool if I roll out of bed around noon, pound a 40, and come to work for a few hours while expecting a high salary and constant praise?"

"No, of course not."

"Then, in your own words, why don't you tell me what you think a rockstar is. Is the rockstar in the room with us right now?"

[–] Aeri@lemmy.world 38 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Everybody wants a rockstar employee until I show up coked out of my mind for work smh.

[–] darkmarx@lemmy.world 12 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Hey, as long as you're a good coder, I don't care how high you are. Though I'll need to find a way to explain the new "Misc" category in my budget.

[–] Remember_the_tooth@lemmy.world 5 points 3 weeks ago

You've done your company a great service, and we thank you and we trust you found the compensation satisfactory.

Oh, the money's fine.

The situation's totally unacceptable.

Well, gentlemen, I guess that just about wraps it up.

Where is the miscellaneous account?

I thought we'd settled that.

The miscellaneous account is somewhere very safe.

From whom?

The account is a source of important funding and it has to be internally audited.

And it will be, I assure you, Mr. Brody,

Dr. Jones.

We have top men working on it right now.

Who?

TOP...MEN

[–] LuxSpark@lemmy.cafe 14 points 3 weeks ago

Rockstar: solve all our problems

[–] M137@lemmy.world 23 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

How do you manage to fuck up so many things?
Quotation marks missing
Period missing
Two spaces before the first quotation mark
Space between the text and quotation mark
All but one entry after the equals sign not being capitalized

[–] swordgeek@lemmy.ca 7 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Never two spaces. NEVER!

Otherwise, spot on.

[–] IHawkMike@lemmy.world 4 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I mean, on a typewriter yeah. But otherwise, no.

[–] jerkface@lemmy.ca 2 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

I like to use two spaces so that regexes and other mechanical means can definitively identify sentences. It also looked a lot better before plaintext started getting shoved into HTML DOMs. I really hate how text rendering doesn't respect wide spaces. But since I am often looking at source, it still makes it read better when I am working on it.

I went for a job interview like 8 years ago and the first thing a guy said to me when I walked into the office was "this job is fucking shit, don't do it". He said it with a grin but I knew he wasn't joking.

Guess what? The job was indeed fucking shit. I actually had respect for that guy for his straight up honesty.

[–] Atropos@lemmy.world 7 points 3 weeks ago

Yeah these are pretty much all red flags, however...

I love 'wearing multiple hats'. Otherwise I get bored! And if you e got a good manager, the inefficiency that comes with multiple hats is understood.

[–] NJSpradlin@lemmy.world 7 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

I use ‘self starter’ at work to describe someone that I don’t have to manage and will figure out what they need to do to manage their own project without me holding their hands.

I provide my own continuity binder and am there to answer any questions once we’re done with a brief left seat/right seat… but, I need someone who is capable of handling themselves instead of me being their parent.

What’s a better word than ‘self starter’ if people see that negatively?

[–] spankmonkey@lemmy.world 14 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (1 children)

They have Initiative if they are able to act on their own based on their training. As in they don't require being told to do their job all the time, they just do it.

If you don't bother with training then you want self starters and hopefully you are fine with whatever shenanigans they come up with.

[–] osaerisxero@kbin.melroy.org 6 points 3 weeks ago

I would also add that 'why use many words when few word do' is usually used to obfuscate bad stuff, so you could potentially pass the vibe check by just saying the above similarity to how you described it here.

[–] thejoker954@lemmy.world 2 points 3 weeks ago

'Willing to do managements job for them'.

[–] WhatTheDuck@piefed.social 3 points 3 weeks ago

This makes me curious if there's a study focused on the effectiveness of job listings with these buzz words vs without. I wonder if more people would apply or if people actually buy into these phrases.

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 3 points 3 weeks ago

I've only had one job that wasn't all of these red flags that wasn't my self employed gig. this fucking economy