(TikTok screencap)
It's a drumming video. How could anyone not find that super cool?! Besides that... are we at that stage, that sharing your passions or cool findings is somehow upsetting?
this post was submitted on 08 Sep 2025
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I don't like being put on the spot. When someone is excited to show me something in this manner, I find that I am less able to focus on the video, because I feel pressured to react in a certain way. One time, a friend showed me something that ended up being something I loved, and was super glad they had shared with me, but they felt hurt because they did not think my enthusiasm was genuine. As a result of situations like that, it's hard not to get up in my own head about how to correctly perform the emotions that I am experiencing. I find it much easier to respond authentically to a cool thing when I'm not feeling under pressure from someone watching me watch a video.
they felt hurt because they did not think my enthusiasm was genuine
I can see myself encountering this issue, and the other person would be right. My enthusiasm is very often fake. My "I'm really enjoying this" face is the one you see in my avatar. Faking reactions to things is how I go through life.
People like to share what's interesting to them, I don't understand why that's a problem. If it's bothersome, say so.
I do, and it doesn't stop.
In my experience, it is the other way around :D
This is such a bad film.
This is such a bad opinion.
Ha, baited you!
I think this is less of a gendered issue and more of a problem with the phone as a group viewing device. I love showing videos. I don't mind being shown videos. I DO mind having to hold my neck weird, or half-hold the phone with someone, or hold it myself and be like... responsible for it. Pretty sure more women than men have shown me a video on their phone too fwiw.
"please no it's so interesting I swear, the Nascar guy did a thing with the wall it was so cool"
This is my wife with TikToks. Holy shit do I not care about the 3 minute complication of ‘silly’ cats…
Flip the script and start sending her TikToks everyday…
3 min compilations of serious cats 🤣
It's a love language!
Since I see at least one or two comments questioning things:
For me, it's a matter of consent and autonomy.
Even if it's something you know for certain I would be interested in seeing, does it really have to be right this second? If you asked me whether I wanted to see it right now on your phone, would you honestly be totally okay with me saying no, and even if so, is there a chance I'd be concerned it would offend/upset you if I said no?
Most of the time, I just don't like being pressured into doing stuff, even if it's stuff I like. And also, if I'm doing other things, it's probably because I need or want to do those other things rather than watch a video with your phone's poor quality speakers, on your small screen that's way too far away, in your shaky hands, and in your hot breath zone.
And also, is this really an issue that's gender / masculinity specific? Based on my personal experience, it's mostly children who do this. And then next in line are adult women younger than 50. But the adult women thing is not so much of an outlier that I'd call this a feminine/woman thing.
In my household, when we have a video we want to force upon others, we share the link or cast it to the TV like old geezers.
I think you're spot on about the autonomy angle. Even if it's a video that I would enjoy watching at that moment, I always feel uncomfy knowing that I can't really say no at that point.
Anecdotally, I have noticed that it is more prevalent of a thing for men to do, but there's definitely a lot more going on than this being straightforwardly gendered. A friend speculated that women are less likely to do it because they are more likely to implicitly understand and be able to navigate situations involving coerced consent. Others in the friend group disagreed with the assertion that this is primarily a male phenomenon, citing their own personal experiences with women showing videos in this manner too. I don't know what to make of it overall, but certainly I've heard enough dissenting opinions to be sure that my own anecdata is not representative of everyone's experiences
All YouTube videos now complain about YouTube.
As with all google products, youtube also went from bad to worse, but it's still enough of a giant monopoly so that they can keep making decisions that fucks both the user and the content creators without real consequences.
Womanly urge to complain about their significant other trying to show them something they thought was cool
This is my mom with Facebook.