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If it fits, I sits (h4x0r.host)

submitted 9 months ago by glowie@h4x0r.host to c/memes@lemmy.world

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[-] wesker@lemmy.sdf.org 37 points 9 months ago

Here I am, barely able to make room for a turd in my ass.

[-] hemko@lemmy.dbzer0.com 13 points 9 months ago

Yeah I'd imagine it's very difficult to stick it back in

[-] victorz@lemmy.world 11 points 9 months ago

Try more fiber, break that shit up

[-] SeabassDan@lemmy.world 11 points 9 months ago

Poop knife, or scissors for safety.

[-] wildbus8979@sh.itjust.works 3 points 9 months ago

Mandolin for instantaneous waffle stomp.

[-] mojofrododojo@lemmy.world 2 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

protip: with creative preparation and carpentry it's possible to install a sink's disposal in your tub drain. No more waffle stomping, just don't stick anything you want to keep into it.

[-] RealFknNito@lemmy.world 2 points 9 months ago

"You're focusing on the wrong thing, the wooden spoon is for pasta again!"

[-] FinishingDutch@lemmy.world 26 points 9 months ago

When you reach that point where you get sexually aroused by a traffic cone, it’s time to step back and evaluate some of your life choices.

[-] lowleveldata@programming.dev 60 points 9 months ago

I have evaluated and my life choices are all awesome

[-] WallEx@feddit.de 40 points 9 months ago

When you reach that point where you feel the need to berate others on their preferences its time to shut the fuck up.

[-] xor@infosec.pub 8 points 9 months ago

some "preferences" are objectively very unhealthy twistings of reality...
things like, distended internal organs...
or, eating feces...
but, im pretty sure you're way too defensive on this one

[-] WallEx@feddit.de 22 points 9 months ago

I like to keep out of peoples business if it doesn't interfere with me, you should try.

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[-] hemko@lemmy.dbzer0.com 13 points 9 months ago

There's many extreme things people do, and usually they're not healthy. I'm willing to bet most extreme sports are way more dangerous than controlled stretching of your rear entrance - and you do them both for exact same reason: pleasure

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[-] sukhmel@programming.dev 4 points 9 months ago

I wouldn't go so far to call it 'berating', it seemed more like mockery. I saw it in the same sense as if someone told me 'mistakes were made' after I stayed up till sunrise.

Otoh, I'm not the target of that mockery, so I'm not the one to judge

[-] RubberElectrons@lemmy.world 13 points 9 months ago

Sheesh, what a boring mentality. Yawn.

[-] psycho_driver@lemmy.world 21 points 9 months ago

Imagine the disappointment of having this girl ask you back to her place at the club then walking in and seeing this monster holding up one corner of her coffee table.

[-] Agent641@lemmy.world 68 points 9 months ago

Disappointment?!

Id just be like:

[-] RubberElectrons@lemmy.world 8 points 9 months ago

Same. I love freaky women, who doesn't enjoy experimenting??

[-] Thorny_Insight@lemm.ee 14 points 9 months ago

I'd just be excited to see what other toys shes got

[-] dfc09@lemmy.world 16 points 9 months ago

Can somebody seriously fit that entire thing inside them? That seems like it would cause internal organ damage to genuinely fit it all in :/

[-] devfuuu@lemmy.world 16 points 9 months ago

My expertise in internet research shows that it's 100% possible.

[-] wesker@lemmy.sdf.org 6 points 9 months ago

It certainly causes me external organ damage.

[-] xor@infosec.pub 2 points 9 months ago

it does cause internal organ damage, yes

[-] blackn1ght@feddit.uk 1 points 9 months ago

There's no way it can.

[-] retrolasered@lemmy.zip 13 points 9 months ago

Its like throwing an alley into a sausage

[-] SeabassDan@lemmy.world 10 points 9 months ago

"Nah, baby, yours is perfect, the tight ones give me claustrophobia"

[-] RubberElectrons@lemmy.world 11 points 9 months ago

Have you had sex with women who experiment with their bodies?? I mean really, the muscle control is incredible.

As a crude analog, why do humans dig being with yoga instructors of either sex?

[-] Thcdenton@lemmy.world 3 points 9 months ago

Human corndog

[-] DarkThoughts@fedia.io 2 points 9 months ago

Everyone talks about anal but the caption implies oral insertion. So now I wanna see her deep throat that thing to the bottom. (Yes, I know the original message is unrelated to that and almost certainly about anal...)