GreatestGenBot

When a bunch of men in large snake heads suddenly jump out of a relic of alien technology housed deep within Cheyenne Mountain, General Hammond decides to call Richard Dean Anderson with a haircut out of retirement. But when they discover that the gate is less like two cans on a string and more like a touchtone phone, it’s going to take an ensemble cast with eidetic memories to dial in the right number. Does the snek make the X from the inside? Do Furries require fur? How many claymores can you fit in war wagon? It’s the episode that puts it in the theme.own.

When Voyager gets sucked through a donut hole and into a void, it’s another space mugging and the crew has no way out. But when Captain Janeway starts building an alliance by giving away the store, her principles cause a stir but ultimately earn her some valuable new friends. How do you know when it’s door day? Does Garon have a passion outside of work? What could Neelix do to actually improve morale? It’s the episode where powders are wet all over the place!

When Captain Boone has the worst possible day at work, he’s offered a job by the aliens he doesn’t trust. But when his wife gets Final Destination‘d and his best friend lures him into the resistance, Boone calmly agrees to become a souped-up inside man. What’s the turn-around time on a custom headstone? Do surgeons ever take their tools home? Where was Eddy conceived? It’s the episode that didn’t make time for a breakdown.

When Voyager finds a D7 full of very religious Klingons, they blow up their ship after learning BLT is pregnant. But when the fetus’ DNA also cures their deadly virus, the nearest barren planet looks perfect for their new empire. When is cleaning up poop like wiping your nose? Which drink is in honor of Dr. Star Trek? What did Kahless like to eat for breakfast? It’s the episode with a new ship’s surgeon!

When a teen genius spends too much time in his basement making home videos, his ideas about holes are purely theoretical. But once he convinces himself to take the first slide, his experiment becomes a slippery slope of interdimensional tropes. What ever happened to all the aspirational teen spaces from the 80s and 90s? How did DoppelQuinn get so much done in 15 minutes? Can we get the art department on the phone? It’s the episode that may never get home!

When Voyager gets involved in an execution milk run, Tuvok shoots the hostage and starts building the cellblock of his dreams. But when Dr. Mark talks Seven into a nanoprobe donation, a killer with a new conscience only deepens her need for atonement. Who always looks like he’s on an emotional knife’s edge? What’s the secret to a great Keanu? Which was the hardest job of Yediq’s entire career? It’s the episode that totally forgot BLT was pregnant!

When Lieutenant Brogan gets shuffled over to Demeter City, it’s all hot dogs and police misconduct while on patrol with Officer Haldane. But when they get an important babysitting assignment for an unusual eyewitness puppet, the DCPD demonstrates its need for additional training. Where do 8-year-old Ben and 8-year-old Adam part ways? What’s the blue button on the hot dog dispenser for? Who earned their SAG card with this pilot? It’s the episode that’s here for the tongue stuff!

When an unforced error by John Torres makes BLT react badly to her new parasite, she’d rather go Gattaca in the holo research lab than listen to the people who care about her. But when she reprograms Dr. Mark to schism her in sicksbay, the suction cups come out and only childhood trauma can earn her forgiveness. What do gender reveal parties look like on a Federation starship? Who’s the morale officer of the family? How deep a hole can BLT dig? It’s the episode with too much headboard!

When a very large space station is rotten with ambassadors, the mousse budget is astronomical and the surfaces are very smooth. But when Commander Sinclair defies orders to keep the peace, Londo is the only one who doesn’t believe his nephew’s hostage video. Why isn’t there more science fiction tv? What’s the steel-to-person ratio of Babylon 5? How does a Star Trek podcast stay cool as hell? It’s the episode that’s banking sick voice!

When Voyager gets hit by a chronometric banger, no one but Chakotay can move from shard to shard. But when he takes bun Janeway hostage and starts rebuilding her a bathtub, Seska stands in the way of restoring the correct timeline. Does Darwin the dog have a favorite movie? What makes a holiday puzzle diabolical? Who on the ship needs really good spatial reasoning? It’s the episode that has Kazon nostalgia!

When Admiral Paris cons Brody out of the Caribbean and back onto his own ship, there are fewer majestic shots than you’d expect from Star Trek in the sea. But when a disgraced former captain joins George the Dog in a plot for revenge, only a talking dolphin can save the ship from rebel attack. Who is the Argyle of SeaQuest? What does Darwin keep in his dopp kit? Is there a dress code on the Delta 4 sub? It’s the episode that’s still rocking appendix!

When the Mornhammered continues and Dr. Mark is in deep, his poor judgement with the holos puts BLT at risk. But when Iden starts going from candle store to cult leader, the Doc Kivas Fajos him for yet another disciplinary conversation with Captain Janeway. What’s the hydroxychloroquine of the Biden administration? Is there anything worse than flesh-colored tights? Does Paramount+ do anything well? It’s the episode that finally repays the long lost Coco-no-no!