We are in the 45th month of March 2020

This is what we have instead of health care, and boy do we have a lot of it

In the last ten years or so ..

American fascist body count (including mass shootings, vehicle incidents): thousands

Antifascist body count: idk like 3?

FBI:

You know what, let's draw up a chunk of the US somewhere, call it New Israel, and move all the Israelis there and leave Palestine alone

"free speech" is a thought-terminating cliche for people too lazy to come up with a real argument or plan to stop fascist rhetoric.

Bam Margera levels of pranking your parents

This is also how I am with customer rewards points.

"Hmm, I have enough to cover today's slice of pizza, but if I save up, I'll have enough for an entire pizza in five years"

But what about the shriveled flower of joy I get from shitting on their happiness

Me except it's "I DON'T WANNA WAIT... FOR OUR LIVES TO BE OVER" during any moment of silence

Used car prices have never been worse, so there's at least one reason

Floating circular saws are bolsters now

communism is when I can't get dollar cheeseburgers