A former boss used to make at least one person at every meeting recite the company's mission and vision statements--yes, two different statements, and if you missed even one word, no matter how inconsequential, he'd get on your ass about it in front of everyone. No surprise that he constantly listened to and quoted management podcasts and audio books, rarely questioning any of them.

I heard on a podcast a long time ago that the Army considered it one of their most successful recruiting tools. Not because it brought in more recruits, but because fewer recruits dropped out, apparently because playing the game led to fewer surprises after joining.

Running at the speed of lobsters!

Source?

I'm not a fan of the "new car smell", for some reason. The "new computer smell", on the other hand, is a rare treat.

we sort of see a 20 percent uplift on the value of that customer because you're locking that person, committing to a longer-term relationship.

Do these people never listen to themselves? Who the hell wants to be "locked"?

It's coming out the wrong end of the phone.

Unacceptable. Different thing bad!

I poked my head in Lemmygrad once, and that was plenty. Shit like this but unironic. Fuck em.

There was one of these signs that said "The most powerful position is on your knees." Longtime favorite of mine.

"SMOKE VERIFICATION CIGARETTE"

Dude, Where's My Car, 17%/47%. I haven't seen it since it was in the theatre, but I remember thinking it was a good disengage-your-brain comedy that got some chuckles and had a plot that was weird enough to be a joke on it's own. What were people expecting, with a title like that?