OldEggNewTricks

Hello! Transbian here. I'm resurrecting my alt account since this is rather personal.

I'm looking for stories and anecdotes rather than advice, but any engagement is welcome :3

I came out as a trans woman about a year ago. At that time I was married (to a cis woman), with a daughter. Nothing has changed on that front. Initially my wife's position was that she was only interested in men, would understand if I turned out the same, and we'd better wait to see how things developed.

We've been married nearly 15 years, and a lot of that time has been somewhat strained, mostly since I was extremely unhappy with life in general (guess why) and taking it out on everyone around me. So typical marital relations are very much a thing of the past. TBH I didn't really enjoy them that much anyway (again guess why).

Since transitioning I'm basically a different person now. So much calmer and laid back, and getting on much better with the family. But of course there's still some lingering resentment from things I'd said and done in the past. I've done a lot of reflecting on my sexuality, and I'm pretty sure that I'm only into women (if maybe a bit flexible in the bedroom; we'll see). The question is where we go from here. Maybe it turns out my wife is either closeted bi, or will make an exception for me. Or maybe she's still not interested sexually, and we decide to open things up on that front (not sure how I'd feel about that yet). Or maybe we part ways.

The interesting thing is that I managed to get married at all. Looking back, my dating style was... not very cis male, to say the least. So the fact that my wife even considered me as a viable partner was... curious, on reflection. Possibly a good sign. And recently, (thanks, estrogen!) I've caught her staring at my chest a lot.

Of course I talk with her regularly about things. But I'm holding back a bit at the moment both to avoid overwhelming her with yet more transition stuff, and because I'm not entirely sure how I feel either.

So, er, there must be some other people here in a similar position. How did things go for you?

Three months on and I've definitely improved since last time. This was the best of several takes, and although I was trying a bit harder than usual it's not too far from my usual zero-effort voice. I just need to remember to keep the resonance tight and stay bright.

I'd give this a C- "almost satisfactory", so let it rip!

I always wanted to be a lesbian. (astronaut, gun).

I don't mean I used them to fix... look, you know what I mean, OK?

/lifetime goal achieved

So I got home and was taking off my makeup. In the mirror I saw a girl taking off her makeup, and I thought, I wish that was me.

That is all.

Tell us what songs that aren't explicitly trans resonate with you!

For example, I challenge anyone to listen to Dream Theater's The Spirit Carries On, imagine it's your old self singing to you, and tell me you don't get The Feels (that includes you, boys!). And alright, I admit that album's pretty borderline, but I hope you get the point.

For many years I thought I was a boy
But it always felt like I wasn't real.
I fantasize about having a feminine body,
But I'm not really trans.
It's just an act
So that I can get HRT
And change my name
And be a girl.

Bank person: Can I see some ID please?
Me: (Hands over driver's license with old photo)
Bank person: (Checks)
Bank person: Err.
Bank person: (Checks some more)
Bank person: Is this your husband?

I'm going to be grinning about this all week :3

She acknowledged that I did talk to her about it beforehand, but hasn't been able to properly process it yet.

We're OK, I'm just venting.

I read Rain this week. I'm sure you all know this comic already. Sorry! Anyway, I really liked it and ordered the print copies too (hope v7 comes out soon!). It's about a trans girl, Rain.

I'd come across it before, a few years ago, when I was still an egg. I didn't get in to it then. At the time, I'd have said it made me feel "kind of uncomfortable, idk", or made some excuse. (Hey, who are you anyway? How did you get in here?). But now I realize I was feeling a lot of dysphoria and envy (thanks, ContraPoints!) to see someone I unconsciously identified so closely with just being herself. This time I just kept bawling my eyes out, so I guess the hormones are working, at least :3

Anyway, something in that story made me snap. I don't want to hide any more. I mean, I'm out to quite a few people already, but I'm done keeping quiet. The whole world can know who I am, and to hell with what anybody thinks. (That said, this is still my alt, so no selfies, sorry!)