Pferdekuss

Yes, it is a whole thing. There are different models with different time frames and it gets tought in the education of the daycare professionals.

I am talking kids aging 0,6 to 3. That is the lower range in Germany and normally you would start with daycare in that age frame. (Not taking into Account Bavaria. I think you get shot or something as a mother if you even think about giving your child to daycare there)

Usually it can be more difficult with older kids though if they have no experience in daycare, since they are more used to only relate to their parents and spending time with them. Also they might faster realize their parents are going to leave them there and that this is going to become the norm for their days. Understandably they are not gonna like that right off the bat.

I worked in other countries as well and it was quite a shock culture wise to have people expect you to rip the crying child of their arms and throw activities at them for up to 9 hours so they get distracted. As I said, sure, the child will cope over time and calm down. But in the long run I doubt it is a good thing development wise. Starting off you WILL distract them from their feelings and that is not the best way to learn how to deal with your emotions all the time.

Usually the institutions will try to have the different kids with their parents at different timetables of the day and start on different days. Usually after a few days the parents will be sent out and gradually lower their time spent in the institution.

Also you normally have different professionals take care of different new kids so you don’t have to take care of all the parents and new kids every day.

Yes, it means you will have a few days and maybe weeks at the start of the kindergarten year where you got some parents there whatching your every move, but you get used to that very fast, especially if you have the feeling you know what you are doing (basically meaning experience).

Hey there, The models for starting in a kindergarten in Germany have a simple reason: Stuffing your 1 to 5 old into a completely strange surrounding with 11 to 24 other completely strange children with 2 to 4 (or even more) completely strange adults with a completely strange daily routine and for your kid for a completely unforseeable timeframe is bound to cause issues for your child. Especially if your child was not prepared beforehand by spending time without you (grandparents f.e) and/or time with other children.

The time it takes your kid to adjust to the new setting depends highly on the professionals you are working with, your attitude in that setting (f.e. Anxiety, curiosity) and the mindset of your child. There might be anxious children with strangers, there might be exploring types of kids and a whole lot in between.

Studies say and from my personal experience they are right: if you give your kid time to adjust and trust the new setting it will be emotionally stronger later on. For example in situations where things don’t work out as they planned or they are scared or hurt.

Of course the professionals will try and probably can make your kid happy for a set timeframe if you just drop it off in a strange environment and fuck off. That’s their job. And your kid will learn to cope over time.

But how on earth is your kid supposed to earn a deep sense of security and trust if you - for your kid - can just randomly drop them off somewhere and come back after an incomprehensible timeframe? But your child will not as well and deeply learn to trust, adjust and manage that way.

That being said, if it takes you months without a setback by illness or something like that, something is going wrong. Talk to the professionals about that and what their current goal is.