96
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
this post was submitted on 27 Aug 2024
96 points (96.2% liked)
Asklemmy
43885 readers
921 users here now
A loosely moderated place to ask open-ended questions
Search asklemmy ๐
If your post meets the following criteria, it's welcome here!
- Open-ended question
- Not offensive: at this point, we do not have the bandwidth to moderate overtly political discussions. Assume best intent and be excellent to each other.
- Not regarding using or support for Lemmy: context, see the list of support communities and tools for finding communities below
- Not ad nauseam inducing: please make sure it is a question that would be new to most members
- An actual topic of discussion
Looking for support?
Looking for a community?
- Lemmyverse: community search
- sub.rehab: maps old subreddits to fediverse options, marks official as such
- !lemmy411@lemmy.ca: a community for finding communities
~Icon~ ~by~ ~@Double_A@discuss.tchncs.de~
founded 5 years ago
MODERATORS
Your and his age are gonna be major variables here. Conversations and relationships work very differently at different life stages.
You sound like you're maybe a teenager? Try asking interesting questions that require some thought to answer, but still leave room for your friend to give an easy thoughtless answer if they want to. Where do you think we'll be in X years? What's something you thought you wanted but as you've gotten okay have realised you actually don't? What do you think we do now thar future generations will think is crazy? Listen to his answers and ask followup questions.
Personally, I've always been most impressed by directness, honesty, intelligence and courage.
36F 30M, both neurodivergents if that also plays a role. Neither particularly lucky in love, though finding people to date isn't hard for either. Both in many ways immature so I don't take personally you presuming I'm a teenager. I absolutely feel as dumb as one to the point of asking this question. Thanks for the answer.
Neurodivergent romances are awkward as fuck. Dunno what to say except sympathy.
relatable
After 30 you should both be able to handle rejection and reject in a nice way. Just make sure you are both sober and sprinkle lots of compliments.
It's not me downvoting you btw. Maybe you are right, perhaps I'm not mentally prepared to handle it. At least I know what to talk about next time I see my therapist
Yes. A professional is much better than ransom lemmy advice.
Your therapist should help you realise that the worse case scenario (rejection) has already happened to you many times in other forms, and you survived.
Hey, what you say is true, but I still find value in the opinions of a bunch of strangers. It's not professional, yet it helps me see what the majority of people would think in my shoes. It's a check-in with reality in a way. I don't think I could get that talking to a single person no matter how good they are. They're two completely different things.