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submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by darthfabulous42069@lemm.ee to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

To extrapolate:

People often say that one should not worry about what others think of them, but life simply doesn't work that way. What other people think of you really does matter; point-in-fact, it can be everything depending on what field you go into.

Like say, for example, you're a business owner and you're recorded arguing with an angry Karen of a customer, the video's posted online, and the internet sides with the Karen. Then, people boycott your business and you're left without a livelihood.

Or perhaps you say something crass and get cancelled. Or simply anger or inconvenience someone with a lot of influence.

Or, even more horrifyingly, say you were assaulted and you came forward, and were ostracized and shunned by your community as a result.

How could one set up their life such that it would be impossible for people like that to rob one of their livelihood? How could one make it impossible for others to shun or ostracize them?

How could a business owner set up their business so that other people couldn't simply shut it down on a whim in such a manner?


EDIT: I'll just "be myself" since that's what the majority of people in the thread want and repeat what I said to another individual:

Honestly, the way everybody is acting is really, really shameful. I am a person who made a thread and gave it a [Serious] tag because I wanted serious, literal answers to a serious problem that, given my chosen career path, will affect me at some point in my life and could potentially ruin it without good info to prepare for such a crisis beforehand. But all I’m getting is denial, mockery, condescension, lies, put-downs.

And it’s rooted in this desire to either pretend the problem is not real because you’re all secretly afraid it’ll affect you yourselves, or it’s because you know it’s real but you view it as a positive because ostracization and shunning people is an emotional cudgel you wield to silence people you don’t agree with on the internet, and answering the question honestly would require framing such actions as a negative and that would make you question the morality of your actions. And that’s not only sick, that’s just cowardly. If you believe cancelling people is morally A-O good, then at least have the temerity to threaten me with a “Don’t speak your mind and mask up” response like at least a few people were honest enough to do.

But don’t insult my intelligence by thinking you can lie to my face and pretend that something I’ve been personally watching happen to other people for over a decade is not, in fact, happening.

Now I came here for a serious answer to a serious problem that affects everyone. If you can't participate in good faith and offer meaningful strategies to avoid or fix such problems and want to either misconstrue it as an emotional issue -- much as you'll do with what I'm saying here after the majority of you demanded I just be myself and not worry about the consequences -- or outright deny it's a real problem when it's been real for over a decade, just don't participate in the thread. Just go elsewhere.


Okay, I just acted like myself. Everyone happy?

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[-] MF_COOM@hexbear.net 47 points 1 year ago

IDK these don't really seem like realistic examples. The number of real people who do nothing wrong but lose their job or get ostracized from their community is vanishingly small.

I really don't think you need to worry about this comrade. Just be a good person and live your life.

[-] RotaryKeyboard@lemmy.ninja 9 points 1 year ago

Exactly. These things seem common because we see examples of them amplified on social media. Most of them are vanishingly rare.

[-] livus@kbin.social 7 points 1 year ago

There are two components to risk: frequency and magnitude. Most people like to mitigate rare events that would be catastrophic if they happened.

For example, I don't go outside during a lightning storm, because even though being struck by lightning is quite rare, it has a high magnitude as it can kill or maim you.

For @darthfabulous42069 social shunning has a significant magnitude.

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this post was submitted on 09 Aug 2023
47 points (73.3% liked)

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