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Trump losing sleep over polling numbers days before election
(www.thedailybeast.com)
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this post was submitted on 02 Nov 2024
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politics
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I want his death to be so nonchalant that nobody even realizes he's actually dead.
like, he goes to take a shit and dies on the toilet and nobody notices for like a day.
and when they find him hes all riggered up and covered in shit and piss.
and the person to find him is a secretary he's treated like shit for years. she takes pics of him, sells them for a huge amount of money, and everyone mocks him for the next two generations.
and in every history book, the last line will be about how he died covered in his own urine and feces.
As if he shits on the toilet...
Now give us a chalant one
he is making a public statement about the results of the election, complaining about how it's rigged against him. He makes the comment, "as god as my witness, I'm not lying!" when he suddenly grabs his chest and pleades into the camera, "me... save... me..."
blood begins to run out his nose all over his face and suit as his face contorts in anguish.
the cameras continue to roll as he falls off stage into an unmoving heap on the floor.
footage cuts to eye witness testimony where a man with a deep southern drawl says, "We was lookin up at him and God struck him down! he fell right in front of me, and began to shit and piss himself. God as my witness!"
the news will run it as his heart hemorrhaging, conservative media will say his heart was too full of love. but all anyone will remember is he died shitting and pissing his pants on national television.
I was hoping for a chest-burster alien maybe
lmao what kind of loser writes out detailed fantasies like this?
Yeah don’t stop there. I’m close.
Agree with everything there, but man. I wouldn't want to get on the bad side of your imagination.
A truly fitting epitaph
lmao what kind of loser writes out detailed fantasies like this?
the same one that made you read it.
twice again
You're essentially bragging about shitting your pants in public.
For someone who read both nonchalant and chalent versions, you don't seem to have been paying attention to the text.