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Selfhosted
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As others have already said, set up a VPN like wireguard, connect to the VPN and then SSH to the server. No need to open ports for SSH.
I do have port 22 open on my network, but it's forwarded to an SSH tarpit: https://github.com/skeeto/endlessh
I have wireguard for other purposes but I also have ssh open on a different port. I don't much understand the argument of exchanging ssh for wireguard. In the end, we're just trading an attack vector for another.
My ssh only allows connections from my user. If I'm using password auth, I also request a 2FA.
Tail scale is also a good idea but I don't like having my control plane under someone else's control.
There is quite a significant difference. An ssh server - even when running on a non-default port - is easily detectable by scanning for it. With a properly configured Wireguard setup this is not the case. As someone scanning from the outside, it is impossible to tell if there is Wireguard listening or not, since it simply won't send any reply to you if you don't have the correct key. Since it uses UDP it isn't even possible to tell if there is any service running on a given UDP port.