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Baldur’s Gate 3 is a story-rich, party-based RPG set in the universe of Dungeons & Dragons, where your choices shape a tale of fellowship and betrayal, survival and sacrifice, and the lure of absolute power. (Website)
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Why did you choose the background that makes you do evil things if you didn't want to do evil things or at least grapple with the struggle of trying (and possibly failing) to overcome those urges?
Also, can't think of a single party member so far except one that is straight up evil. Selfish sure, but realistically ALL people are either self-interested or suicidal. Even the folks who do selfless things do so for some sort of selfish reason, even if that's personal fulfillment through good deeds. But even the first two companions are neutral at worst. Rude? Definitely. Not evil. And their views can evolve over time.
Also... How do you KNOW you aren't fighting for something bigger?
Hate to nitpick an opinion but it feels like these problems are self-inflicted or based on the first 15 minutes of the story with most of the dialogue skipped.
"I hit myself on the head with this stick and now it hurts. How could the stick do this to me?"