It's that time of the year again.

It happens to me once or twice a year: all ten toes itch like a mofo. It comes at random, but usually around fall and spring. It might have something to do with large temperature changes, but no matter what I wear, I still haven't found out how to prevent it happening.

I've tried a massage, hot mud pads, cold gel pads, icy-hot balm, going to the sauna, painkillers (the non-addictive kind), and I'm nearing the bottom of this small bottle of bourbon because it's driving me insane.

If anybody has any suggestion, I'm all ears.