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this post was submitted on 17 Aug 2023
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"Minister orders town to evacuate by noon or face the consequences" has a very Old Testament feel to it.
A city the size of Yellowknife in the Northwest Territories being destroyed by a wildfire has a decidedly apocalyptic feel to it ... so the orders track.
I totally agree it's not funny. It's a tragedy. But I did sincerely misunderstand what I read. "Why the fuck is a minister evacuating a town?" To be fair, I'm American, so the "minister" threw me.
"And know not one soul shall be found upon these lands, for any who remain know His wrath and only the suffering of Hell.
Flee, oh righteous souls, for once the sun is upon it's apex, the wrath of the Holy Father will consume you all!"
"Dammit, just tell us there's a fire and we need to leave!"