this post was submitted on 25 Apr 2025
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If you truly love your partner, does a ring and a ceremony really do anything?

I know there are certain legal situations where an official marriage changes who has certain rights, but aren't those same rights available if you make other legally-official decisions E.G. a will or trusts, etc?

I'm generally curious why people get married beyond the "because I love them" when it costs so much money.

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[–] markovs_gun@lemmy.world 8 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

It greatly simplifies life from a legal standpoint. It's basically like creating a tiny corporation of two people that can act as a single legal entity. If you're married it simplifies buying a house together, inheritance, medical decisions, etc. As others have pointed out, these are important especially when your partner's family don't approve of you or the relationship especially for LGBT people.

I am going to break the mold though and say the actual ceremony is important too. Declaring your intention to stay together for life in front of your friends and family changes things. It adds a level of security and finality to the relationship- you have to put your money where your mouth is on the relationship. Although people frequently do it, I don't know how someone can go through the wedding process without reflecting on how big of a deal it is to stand up in front of so many of your friends and family and declare your intention to stay together forever, even without the religious ritual aspect of it. I wouldn't want to have kids with someone without having this commitment, for example. Ultimately even though marriage is a social construct, I think it's still a useful one even in a world where women are no longer considered property of men.

[–] null_dot@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 11 hours ago (1 children)

My defacto partner and I have been together for 12 years. We've been trying to have kids for 6 years or so and got lucky with twins 2 years ago.

Being married wouldn't strengthen our bond or commitment in any way.

It's a shame my partner doesn't have the same surname as our kids. I've been meaning to ask her how she feels about it.

[–] Madzielle@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 40 minutes ago* (last edited 40 minutes ago)

I wasn't married when I had my child. Chose to hyphenate. I'm unsure how I feel for your wife if this topic didn't come up two years ago, goodness