MoreWrite

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post bits of your writing and links to stuff you’ve written here for constructive criticism.

if you post anything here try to specify what kind of feedback you would like. For example, are you looking for a critique of your assertions, creative feedback, or an unbiased editorial review?

if OP specifies what kind of feedback they'd like, please respect it. If they don't specify, don't take it as an invite to debate the semantics of what they are writing about. Honest feedback isn’t required to be nice, but don’t be an asshole.

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submitted 2 days ago by SnokenKeekaGuard@lemmy.dbzer0.com to c/morewrite@awful.systems

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Would love any and all critique.

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[–] SnokenKeekaGuard@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 17 hours ago

Thank you so much. Really appreciate that! I'm glad this is being read as its intended to.

It took embarrassingly long for me to decide on a quote there. I had a few options that were thematically correct but I also wanted something that would make sense for the character since I don't have much time to flesh out characters in a story so short.