Pretty sure they blocked me after I commented, so no screenshot.
The US essentially has no restrictions on what parents can do to their children, or pay to have done to them. These companies will show up at night, and take a child out of their bed at night. They explicitly tell parents not to warn the kid what will happen.
Imagine being woken up in the middle of the night, maybe forced to quickly pack, and then be loaded in a van. You have no idea where you are going or why or who or what is going on. You get taken to a facility which is basically a cult. You might be dumped out in rural Utah, with people that have zero training in wilderness safety, who might punish you by denying you food and water.
Children die in these places all the fucking time. There generally is no state or federal oversight of these facilities - so there aren’t really investigations. These places are havens for child predators.
When I was sexually abused at a similar facility and tried to report it - I was placed on heavy doses of antipsychotics in retaliation. They drugged me unconscious, and then punished me for sleeping during “class.” As an adult, I have involuntary shakes and movements associated with the medical malpractice enacted on me.
These places don’t get investigated, they don’t get shut down. I think Utah is one of the only states with any form of agency that watches over these places. Child protective services won’t go in, health care agencies won’t go in.
Children have no rights in the US. They are the property of their parents, to be disposed of as they wish. And fuckers like this agency are delighted to kidnap children that their parents can’t be assed to parent.
Yeah - I wish more folks understood what the experience is like. It’s like my brain lights on fire. I get angry, extremely angry and can be verbally really aggressive. If I’m alone, I can usually self regulate, but when I’m around others it’s much harder.
It’s been a struggle as I work to get this facility shut down. When I’m calling state agencies to get my torturer’s facility investigated, the second that I can pick up that they don’t believe, or if they minimize my experience - it ratchets me into a world of pure anger and panic.
I knocked over a container earlier and it made a loud sound as it landed on the ground - it made me angry. Embarrassingly ridiculously angry. It’s stupid, but I had the urge to throw the thing at the wall! I wanted to cuss it out! It’s an inanimate object, it didn’t break, I just needed to pick it up and put the pencils back in. It wasn’t a big deal. But in that split second where I went to that lizard brain, I was furious!
Have you ever been to a support group for this? What you're describing is a pretty severe ptsd reaction. I know you said elsewhere that you've done a lot of mental health stuff and it's not helped and has been furtherly traumatic, but having other people who can listen and you can know that they do understand might be good for you.