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Solidarity. I can say that from the other side of that coin, it's not always better... Divorced when I was 12, I told my mother "about fucking time" and got slapped.
My single mother later destroyed my teenage years and 20s. She died and it took 10 years for the financial fraud to fall away. I'm still working to escape damage from her extorting and manipulating me by threatening to accuse me of molesting my daughter with several of her friends willing to lie to police.
I hope you at least came away with positives to build with.
I'm so sorry, that sounds awful. I did get lucky in the sense that I had one good enough parent, which is honestly probably while I'm still alive and doing alright. I still talk to my Mom on a weekly basis. She had a lot of unwinding to do after her divorce. It's tricky to get an abusive narcissist out of your head. They have a way of living there.
I hope you're doing better! Your perseverance is admirable as hell.
Sometimes getting through adversity and hardship can make us into better, tougher, and more empathetic adults than we would've been if our childhoods had been easier. I hope that's the case for you.
No joke! That's been the worst!
I'm glad you still have her around, and the chance to share time without the negatives.
I am. My 21 year old daughter has been evidence that I'm doing something ok despite, and it's amazing.
One of the most healing things so far has been the fact that I can look back and feel confident that I was right every time I thought "this feels like it is wrong and should be different". My daughter still finds me regularly for spontaneous hugs and any time something needs fixing that she hadn't figured out yet.
I hope you find a similar chance. It's deserved.