Off My Chest

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I don't take my fiancée out for dinner because she doesn't know how to order off a menu. (lemmy.world)

submitted 2 days ago by PP_BOY_@lemmy.world to c/goodoffmychest@lemmy.world

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My fiancée does not know how to order off a menu. Actually she does, she doesn't care to order from a menu like most people do.

Going out to eat with her is pretty much an hour long ordeal of me gritting my teeth while she racks up a bill 3x mine, all while trying nicely to steer her to just one item. She'll open the menu, get overwhelmed with options, and end up ordering a la carte from places that do not work that way, asking for endless substitutions and upcharges. As an example, at a restaraunt, she might not be able to decide between a burger or chicken tenders, so she'll ask for "a half order" of both of them, then she likes the sound of one specific dipping sauce that comes with another entree so she'll ask for a cup of that, etc. Etc. I'll say something before we go in, she'll promise me she'll just get a water, and then get a water - and a margarita. It's draining. At this point, we go out maybe once pr twice a year unless something forces us out more than that.

The scenario that prompted this rant was that tonight was one of those times. Our bill was $82.10. My entree plus water was $10.99.

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[–] SimpleMachine@sh.itjust.works 43 points 2 days ago (1 children)

At the end of the day here's the truth of the matter. This will not change, and it will bother you for the rest of your time together. If this is actually annoying enough for you to post this here, it will only get worse over time. You're not gonna get used to it, you will likely grow to resent her for it. People don't change, not really. Decide now, this is a deal breaker or not. There's no way this behaviour doesn't bleed into other shit in your lives. Changing course this far into the game is hard, but I suspect that you already know what you wanted to hear from everyone the moment you posted this. Listen to your gut.

[–] neukenindekeuken@sh.itjust.works 2 points 20 hours ago (1 children)

The honest advice here nobody likes to hear, but is the reality.

Occasionally people like this can change, but it takes some pretty serious life events to cause a behavioral change like that to stick. Something like a divorce, death in the family, personal near death experience, becoming destitute, watching something horrible happen in front of you, etc.

Point being, it's unlikely to change anytime soon.