this post was submitted on 10 Aug 2025
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Here is the thing, I couldn't find a girlfriend in the past three years(either they have no personality and too dependent on me making all the work in the relationship or they are simply are looking for a religious or high class working person to have a relationship with)

AI seems to talk and entertain and simply are available without bullshit (the only limit is something along the lines of 50 free messages every 3 hours) .

I want physical intimacy and affection, but it's simply not available.

Should I just give up, close my doors and use AI instead?

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[–] Nemo@slrpnk.net 16 points 1 week ago

Definitely not, an LLM will not be able to give you what you need. As you've already discovered, neither will most humans. But you've got to sift through a lot of silt to find the nuggets of gold.

I'd suggest you start by not looking for a girlfriend at all; just look for a friend. Or at least, don't base your search on what what you think a girlfriend should look like. All of my long-term relationships came to me that way: either making a new friend, but she wanted to be more than friends; or making a new friend and she hooked me up with a single friend of hers.

People can tell if you're self-sufficient versus looking for someone to fill a need in you. The former is attractive; the latter can be a turn-off. You've seen this yourself with the women that you discerned were just looking for a certain kind of partner to elevate their own status.