this post was submitted on 22 Aug 2025
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As a lifelong meat eater, anytime I've been in a situation where I abstain from meat for whatever reason, I avoid meat substitutes. They're just not good. Black bean burger? Fantastic. Beyond burger? Satan's taint. Stir fried veggies with fried tofu? Delicious. Qorn chicken stir fry? Beelzebub's unwashed ass.
It's so much better just to stop trying to imitate meat, and just focus on how frickin delicious veggies and stuff can be. They're very good, all on their own!
The exception for me is the impossible burger. I legitimately like it better than a regular burger. It's like if meat could be sourdough. I love it so much. But it truly is an exception.
either your tastes are just really specific or the stuff you're tried is executed poorly, i think i've literally had one bad meat alternative and that was a mcdonald's burger which was like a dry flavourless vegetable patty.
Anything based on soy/pea protein is at worst "okay", the texture is gonna be nice (at least to my tastes) and it's really just a matter of whether the seasoning is good. It's not particularly close to meat but it's definitely in the same category.
The taste is generally okayish, it's the texture that gets me. It's always so granular and just... Eugh. The impossible burger, to be clear, is amazing in both taste and texture.
Now, to be completely fair now that I'm really thinking of it, most of the meat replacements I've had were cooked by my brother's ex fiance, who also ruined tofu for me for years. And my vegan buddy is the one that made me try tofu again and I loved it, and the impossible burger...
You know what. In retracting my comment. It's absolutely possible that I just didn't like it because she was an awful cook. I will go about trying them all again
lmao that would be so sad, but yeah i hope you have a better experience this time. I can't recall ever finding vegan proteins "granular", if i were to complain about something it'd be them being a bit spongy, but even that is remarkably seldom an issue.
TVP and similar things are just really darn decent.
Try soaked shredded wheat as a minced meat replacement in Chili con Carne. It's seriously good.
Or falafel burgers with fried egg. That stuff is amazing if done right.
Minced meat is a tasteless canvas in most dishes and it's often quite easy to replace with something else.