ADHD

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A casual community for people with ADHD

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Relevant Lemmy communities:

Neurodivergent Life Hacks

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founded 2 years ago

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Request: basic communication skills (lemmy.blahaj.zone)

submitted 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) by SoleInvictus@lemmy.blahaj.zone to c/adhd@lemmy.world

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Hey everyone, I'm hoping to get some advice for my partner.

She and I both have ADHD. She consistently has great difficulty communicating clearly and neither of us is sure what to do about it. Where an ideal narrative could be mapped in a straight line, hers would look like a series of loops, whorls, and jagged deviations as she frequently repeats herself, relays events out of order, changes topics inappropriately and without warning, omits entire parts of sentences, etc.

I love her so much so it pains me to say that it's bad. It's really, really bad, and I see how it frustrates her. It's interfering with our relationship as it makes even low stakes conversations agonizing and higher stakes topics often impossible. It holds her back in her personal and professional life. I used to have the same issue, but what helped me isn't really applicable for her.

Does anyone have any resources, ADHD specific or not, that might help her get started in basic, effective communication? She's such a wonderful, intelligent person, and I just want to help her succeed in being able to share that with others.

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[–] AnarchistArtificer@slrpnk.net 2 points 1 month ago

That reminds me of the kind of thing I do when I get off topic and forget what I was saying. I'll say "what were we talking about before this?", and given that my conversation partner has a decent chance of also being ADHD, we often end up remembering the thing that was a few topics back, and then tracing forward from there.

It helps to retrace your steps in the conversation, I've found. It can also be helpful for helping me to remember the broader shape of my argument, if these topics being strung together is actually getting at a larger point