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Lemmy users, how do you deal with the current dating sphere? Assuming you haven't found Thee One? (sh.itjust.works)

submitted 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) by Steamymoomilk@sh.itjust.works to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

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I feel dating kinda sucks, a large portion of my generation is chronically online and i feel many don't know how to socialize in person.

I recently was eating at a local dinner, and saw somebody eating by themself. I walked up and ask if this seat was taken and they said no. But looked like a rabbit in a wolfs den, i introduced myself and we both got to know each other. I gave her my number but never got any call or text.

I feel lots of people around me are unappealing, yes i know that sounds seminaristic. Ive tried a foss dating app called alovoa, because i feel every other dating app would steal your liver if they legally could. The app has brought me miniscule success, i have made one friend whom i occasionally chat with.

But it kinda leaves me in a state of i want to meet new people, because at least where i live. The dating pool is really small, and my job isnt a public facing job (machine shop)

Any advise from the elders of lemmy?

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[–] blackbrook@mander.xyz 3 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

It's always a numbers game. The more times you roll the dice the sooner you'll see success. The lower the chances the more times you need to roll em.

A general thing you can say about opportunity is to put yourself places where opportunities happen, even rare ones. But sorry I don't have any advice about where those places are.

Also, non successful attempts can still be learning experience.

[–] sbv@sh.itjust.works 4 points 1 week ago

Nonsuccessful attempts are exhausting and can be kind of soul destroying. After a certain point you realize you're not so much learning as reconfirming what you already know.

I agree with the sentiment to keep trying, but the end of each try hurts.