ADHD

12012 readers

435 users here now

A casual community for people with ADHD

Values:

Acceptance, Openness, Understanding, Equality, Reciprocity.

Rules:

No abusive, derogatory, or offensive post/comments.
No porn, gore, spam, or advertisements allowed.
Do not request for donations.
Do not link to other social media or paywalled content.
Do not gatekeep or diagnose.
Mark NSFW content accordingly.
No racism, homophobia, sexism, ableism, or ageism.
Respectful venting, including dealing with oppressive neurotypical culture, is okay.
Discussing other neurological problems like autism, anxiety, ptsd, and brain injury are allowed.
Discussions regarding medication are allowed as long as you are describing your own situation and not telling others what to do (only qualified medical practitioners can prescribe medication).

Encouraged:

Funny memes.
Welcoming and accepting attitudes.
Questions on confusing situations.
Seeking and sharing support.
Engagement in our values.

Relevant Lemmy communities:

Neurodivergent Life Hacks

lemmy.world/c/adhd will happily promote other ND communities as long as said communities demonstrate that they share our values.

founded 2 years ago

MODERATORS

MrPoopyButthole@lemmy.world

MrPoopyButthole@lemmy.dbzer0.com

Is struggling with goals a human problem or an adhd problem (sh.itjust.works)

submitted 2 weeks ago by bridgeenjoyer@sh.itjust.works to c/adhd@lemmy.world

22 comments fedilink hide all child comments

I have never been able to set goals. Mostly because I'm working on 100 projects at once. But also because a goal could get changed by something outside of your control.

If I do try making goals, they usually just end up being "make more money so I can put it toward project #67 to maybe get closer to done". I've kind of had the goal of "learn to program" my whole life but never can get past chapter 2 of any class I take. I've kind of started a visual basic training but even once im done with that its not like i can go off and make a program that is useful. And game design requires such an insane e time commitment id have to stop all my other projects to even think about that route.

I guess a big part is I dont see a point in goals either. Everything is always dynamic so even if you reach a goal it may not even matter by the time you finish it.

My day job is mildly challenging but mostly easy. We have to set 4 goals a year but I usually just make them something im already doing (update how tos for certain tasks, take a business seminar class, etc).

And im only mildly adhd (so they say. I feel like its way worse, I just hide it very well).

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments

[–] monkeyman512@lemmy.world 4 points 2 weeks ago

It can be challenging and the pattern of making goals and not hitting them can be frustrating enough that you just stop trying to make goals. These are some things I find help me get stuff done.

Social pressure keeps me focused very well, so I go to gym classes. Anytime I work out alone it is a struggle to not just bail early. So I will try to integrate social pressure into things that I find important.

Setting standards instead of goals. One example was me wanting to better understand TCP/IP networking. So I set a standard of reading the textbook I had on the topic 30 minutes a day. Some days I did less some days I only read a couple pages due to poor focus. But I just stayed focused on meeting the standard every day. I ended up reading through more than half of a very thick textbook with dense technical information. Way further than I would have otherwise.

Next is to set a priority queue. It's hard to focus on 10 projects. It is much easier to focus on a single top priority and not worry about the other 9 at all.

Last is be realistic about your limitations. It is easy to set your expectations based on your best days and beat yourself up on your crap days. Also I find my "Best days" are frequently me hyper focusing so hard I have 2 crap days after to recover. Some times it's not about what you "should do" and more about what you "can do".