this post was submitted on 13 Sep 2025
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Witches VS Patriarchy
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So, here's where I am on this.
Both things are true: real reports of doing bad things to others should be taken seriously, and prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law.
False reports should not happen.
The problem is that, since it's possible to falsely report such a crime, anyone, whether guilty or not, can use that fact against their accuser. Additionally, the fact that there's full assed legal cases where it turns out that the accusations of wrongdoing were indeed false, only serves to lean many people towards doubt.
In addition to all of this, false allegations can absolutely ruin lives. There are people out there on sex offender registries who didn't do anything wrong, sometimes they lose their children, get driven out of communities, etc.... It absolutely can ruin lives.
Unless you have money to burn.
If that's the case then you can fight and win the lengthy legal battles you need to fight to win the case, or at least run out the finances of the opposition. In either case, because of the above and because there's no conviction, especially in the case of the rich and/or the famous, people will either completely forget it happened, or they will see that the case is dropped/settled/discontinued or whatever, and think "see, they're not found guilty, so they must be innocent"
Not realizing that not being found guilty, does not, and should not, imply innocence.
I would add in that it's hard as an individual man who has not sexually assaulted or raped anybody to not feel somewhat targeted or falsely accused by these things.
I am on the victim's side.
Rapists and sexual assaulters should suffer every indignity necessary to restore the balance of what they have done, but it's also understandable that innocent people who get caught up in these shotgun blast social media responses take personal offense at it.
It feels like being accused of something heinous and it's normal and natural to be indignant when you are falsely accused of a crime.
At the same time, though, for me, a man to get into this conversation as if I were somehow a part of it to begin with also causes me to step on the rightful hurt feelings of people who have experienced sexual assault or some sort of gender-based trauma.
It's essentially impossible to thread the needle on this.