this post was submitted on 19 Sep 2023
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[–] drolex@sopuli.xyz 30 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (4 children)

she doesn't display any of Jesus's qualities

Disagree.

She has long hair. Ok, not specified in the bible, but it's canon at this point.

Also the episode of Jesus whoring at the theatre... Wait what is this bible?

[–] Setarkus@toast.ooo 12 points 2 years ago (1 children)

For a moment I really thought there was something in the bible that could be seen as Jesus "whoring at the theater"

[–] frezik@midwest.social 4 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Might be in one of the Gnostic gospels.

[–] drolex@sopuli.xyz 5 points 2 years ago

Brawndon 6:4-7 And thus went Big J to the theatre, for Pagliacus was in town. But when the spectacle started, Jesus was overcome by the lust of whoring. And so it came to pass that he was brought to the tribunal for indecent exposure, and whoring, and petty theft and also grand theft auto, bribery, and contempt, and illegal possession of firearms, and possession and sale of drugs, and illegal possession of a dangerous animal.

[–] Ya_Boy_Skinny_Penis@lemmy.world 9 points 2 years ago (1 children)

She is also white, like Jesus.

[–] drolex@sopuli.xyz 6 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

True true. And also christian, like Jesus the Jew.

[–] eestileib@sh.itjust.works 6 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Jesus had hair like lamb's wool, canonically.

[–] GreatGrapeApe@reddthat.com 4 points 2 years ago (2 children)
[–] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 7 points 2 years ago (1 children)

No, he was the only white guy in the middle east, as proven buy all church depictions, which are basically photographs. /s

[–] GreatGrapeApe@reddthat.com 4 points 2 years ago

Or are based on Cesare Borgia

[–] pedro@lemm.ee 4 points 2 years ago

I knew the guy was an alien!

[–] leaky_shower_thought@feddit.nl 3 points 2 years ago

i've heard about this supply-side jesus doing miracles. she pretty much raised some dead tent there.