79
how do you know? (lemmy.ml)
submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by Gebruikersnaam@lemmy.ml to c/mtf@lemmy.blahaj.zone
42 comments fedilink hide all child comments

I'm not sure whether this is the right place for this question, but... How do you know?

Like, I would 100% be a woman if I could choose. I also always play a female character in games. When I see a girl I feel a strong sexual attraction, but I also feel jealous of her.

But, I'm honestly not sure if I am not cisgendered. I feel like I missed the boat. I also don't know if I am sure enough. Is this impostor syndrome? How do I know it's not just sexual attraction? Or me being unhappy with the role men have in this world? Or me being depressed otherwise? It all seems like a big tangled mess.

Thanks a lot for all the comments. I made an appointment with my GP next week and hope that he can refer me to a therapist. All the best to you all <3

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[-] ada@lemmy.blahaj.zone 9 points 1 year ago

In my case, my therapist has voiced a tentative opinion that, what at first felt to me to be a desire to be a woman, has been me conflating my own identity with my unrestrained sexual desires and fetishes

This is a huge red flag. That right there is straight from anti trans conversion therapy tactics.

A therapist should not be telling you who you are or who you aren't, they should be helping you find yourself. And that there is not helping you find yourself, it's taking someone struggling to find themselves and then pushing them in a certain direction.

If you are trans, all you will get from following that path is pain and anguish, because nothing will ever feel right about pretending you're not.

If I were you, I would ask your therapist something like this. Now that you've explored the possibility that you're not trans, and what that might mean, and how you arrived there, how about you explore the possibility that you might be trans, and see where that exploration leads you.

If they push back, and refuse to consider anything like that as an option, or if they allow it, but start loading the conversation with negative stereotypes about being trans and comparing it to a fetish, then you need to get away from that therapist for your own well being.

You might be trans, you might not be, but you need to find a therapist who is open to helping you find that answer, not a therapist that thinks they already have the answer and is trying to push you down that path. Make sure therapist is the former, not the latter.

this post was submitted on 25 Sep 2023
79 points (100.0% liked)

Transfem

3422 readers
47 users here now

A community for transfeminine people and experiences.

This is a supportive community for all transfeminine or questioning people. Anyone is welcome to participate in this community but disrupting the safety of this space for trans feminine people is unacceptable and will result in moderator action.

Debate surrounding transgender rights or acceptance will result in an immediate ban.

Posters may express that they are looking for responses and support from groups with certain experiences (eg. trans people, trans people with supportive parents, trans parents.). Please respect those requests and be mindful that your experience may differ from others here.

To make such a request, at the start of the body of your post, not in the title, the first line should look like the this: [Requesting Engagement from _________]

Some helpful links:

Support Hotlines:

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
LadyAutumn@lemmy.blahaj.zone
ada@lemmy.blahaj.zone