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this post was submitted on 28 Sep 2023
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Asklemmy
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Talk to N and mother first. Open with your personal concern, and experience - to explain why you care, your good intention, and to give significance/urgency to the issue at hand
Offer your help in supporting them in their efforts. Discuss with them how they see it, the state they're in, what they can do and influence.
I'd consider two approaches - not one or the other, but chase/asses both.
If they don't want your help, or don't see any approaches as feasible, accept it as it is and that you can only do so much and not help everyone even if it's in your capability and interest.