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Help! The Taliban ate my face!
(archive.ph)
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Also feel free to check out !leopardsatemyface@lemm.ee (also active).
Icon credit C. Brück on Wikimedia Commons.
Nah, Romans were gay
—Him, definitely
Edit: I just wish I had an old-timey slur to make it more realistic
Well they probably were gay. A lot of them were very much into that kind of thing and no one back then seemed to mind.
This is such an understated reply, very humorous :)
Edit: also, an orifice is an orifice