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What trick do you WISH you could teach your cat?
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Easily done.
To teach the shitting part you'll need a spare toilet seat. Take that seat and screw it into a toilet box and place it next to the toilet. Every few weeks raise the spare seat up by a few inches until it's next to the toilet. Then remove the spare seat and box.
To teach how to flush, react with treats every time the cat hits the flusher. Be prepared for all night flushing.